if you feel sad i can eat you

Bear me with this for a while. Pretend we're in a bar and I talk to you because you're a stranger and I'll say some tacky philosophical bullshit like this:

"You know dude? The more I trust someone, the more I talk to them, and the more I talk to them, the more I need them, you know, they grow into a source of comfort, serotonin party in your head. You kind of needing that to hold on so you can see colors in life and keep you off from jumping off a window. But with me, the more I need them, the more I attach to them. My terrifying neediness and attachment had been proven to chase people away. Someone even described that my feeling is like a waterfall, not at all like a soothing rain on your skin, it will sink you.

One professor talked to me that probably I'm destined to be alone because of my difficult personality. Look at my bags, filled with abandonment and trust issues, I carried them everywhere and use them as a fort."

I sipped my beer, you sipped yours.

"I had the pleasure of knowing the people I love, you know? They gave meanings. But I'm truly sorry that they had to deal with me. I'm such a heavyweight. It's disgusting. I'm disgusting. Oh god, you know what I'm thinking right now? Probably I'm in a gutter of hell and in a borrowed heaven at the same time, it's so obscure. I'm quite tired of chasing things but to live a sedentary life? I can't afford that. I've tried my best to be a friend, to be a son, to be a brother. Nothing worked well."

I sipped my beer, you sipped yours.

"My point is, if we stop talking we stop needing, we stop the attachment, we stop that miserable feeling of being left behind. That is a very simple logic. After all, what is the point of it all? We don't really have free will and fuck all of this shit."

And then I light a cigarette.

ps: i dont know the source of this meme, but i like it so much, let me know if you have info so i can credit it.